One of the goals of our Restore! plan for parish renewal is to move parishioners from a "consumer Catholic" mentality (I come to get, not to give) to
true discipleship; one who makes Christ and faith the center of
his/her life. At St. Pius we encounter consumer Catholicism in many
ways, but it becomes especially noticeable when it comes to sacraments.
Folks who are not members or are former members approach us regularly
requesting baptisms, weddings, funerals, sponsor forms, etc. Funerals
can be especially challenging for us on many levels. In their book Tools for Rebuilding (the follow up to their best seller Rebuilt), Fr.
White and Tom Corcoran devote a chapter to funerals, which they refer
to as "the scud missiles of the parish". Now, let me begin by saying
the parish staff and I consider it a great honor to host funerals for
our parishioners. Our goal is for our funerals to be true celebrations
of the lives of dedicated disciples. And we prepare for them while
continuing to do everything else that occurs in the daily life of our
parish (as I write this column my associate and I just celebrated four
funerals in the past five days!) We want the family to be able to show up and
experience a well planned, comforting and beautiful funeral liturgy. But
we regularly receive requests for funerals for non-members or those who
for many years have not been members our parish or any parish. These are the scud missiles. These calls come without warning and can reek havoc
depending on how we respond. But because of the time and effort
required to give our members the best we can at a time of death, we
simply cannot do this for non members. I estimate that one full day of
the week is given for every funeral (consider the time meeting with
family, lining up liturgical ministers, homily prep, viewing, Mass, and
interment). The myth is that if a parish pulls out all the stops and
does funerals for non-members that it will "bring them back to church".
In my 28 years as a priest I have seen this happen only one time. I wish
a funeral had this power in the life of someone who is not practicing,
but it doesn't. Folks choose to not come to church for many reasons. The
funeral of a loved one does not change that. Why am I telling you
this? Partly for educational purposes, but also because you may know
someone who has been told, "Sorry, we can't". I know that no one wants
to hear the word "no" when it comes to a sacrament. And a Catholic
funeral is a sacrament; meant to be an expression of the committed faith
life of the deceased. Our Restore! plan aims to lead folks from a
consumer mentality to true discipleship. It's a solid plan to bring
people to Christ and the Kingdom. The goal of which is, ultimately,
eternal life with the Lord. |